Motivated by fear or purpose?

Why do you get up in the morning? Because your boss might fire you if you don’t show up or because you are working on something that will change the world? Because you have children to feed and a spouse to take care of or because you feel a burning passion about the projects awaiting you?

Motivation is the reason we do anything. Why we get up in the morning and lay down at night. Why we pay our taxes, raise our children, do exercise. Why we enter a relationship and why we end it. Motivation is the force behind our actions (and lack thereof).

Research speaks of intrinsic and extrinsic motivation. Either something internal motivates you to act (a value, an enjoyment, a desire) or something external (an authority, a circumstance, an expectation). It’s a simple model, yet I want to simplify it further. Cause if you think about it – isn’t all motivation intrinsic? And not only that; isn’t all motivation either based on fear or on purpose?

Let’s look at an example. A student is motivated to do her homework. Not because she wants to, but because she was asked to do so by her teacher. That’s a basic extrinsic motivational situation. However, isn’t it more fair to say that this student does her homework because she is scared of the consequences of not doing them? Her teacher might give her a bad grade, her parents might scold her, and her classmates might think badly of her.

Or an employee is motivated to work long hours because he hopes to receive praise and admiration from his social circle. Again, a typical case of extrinsic motivation. I would suggest, though, that his motivation is based upon the fear of not being accepted and not finding a sense of belonging.

I could offer more examples, but I’m sure you get the drift: In most cases, our choices are unconsciously directed by an underlying fear. We long to belong, to be accepted, to be loved. So we accommodate to the expectations of others and perhaps even persuade ourselves that we agree with the opinions of others in order to fulfil that basic human need.

Judging from my daily interactions, most of our motivation is based upon fear. The stress level, the unhappiness, the anxiety. How many people do you know that are satisfied, have peace of mind and a strong sense of trust in the future? They exist, but they are rare.

What unites the couple I know is their deep connection to their inner passion. They act because they have a strong feeling of purpose and a sense of the bigger picture. Their feeling of purpose and their broader perspective override their fears. They might still feel afraid or anxious, but that other feeling of purpose and passion is too strong for their fear to control their actions.

It’s another kind of motivation. And it’s a powerful one. One that pushes you forward, instead of holding you back – and in a way that feels good, right, true.

It’s one we should strive for. Imagine the energy of going to school or to work because you see how that action supports your personal vision? Regardless of how challenging your school or work life would be at times, nothing in the world would keep you from pushing through because the struggle would bring you closer to fulfilling your purpose. You would be on fire.

It’s a journey I’m currently on, moving from fear to purpose.

So how do you get there? How you develop this kind of motivation? I have three suggestions for you:

1. Create a personal vision statement: A one-liner that gives you direction.
2. Identify your fears: What are you afraid of? What might be controlling your actions?
3. Act, don’t react: Our first impulses tend to be based upon our fears. Pause for a moment, think it through, and then act.

Imagine only doing things you deeply want to do, instead of things you just feel like you want to do. Imagine a life of purpose, instead one of fear. Imagine having peace of mind, instead of endless worries. Mornings would be full of excitement and nights full of satisfaction.